Finding the Good in Goodbye

“I know there’s nothing good in goodbye.”  This line from HAIM’s song “Honey & I” rang true in my life as I sat on my fuzzy blanket on my bed thinking about having to leave my best friend.  I felt the pain of just thinking of leaving her six months before the actual departure date for my big move; tears jumped out of my eyes like Niagara Falls.  I could picture the day I’d have to drive away from her house, knowing it wouldn’t be months till I saw her next.  Looking around my bedroom, it’s pretty difficult to divorce these past several years and my friendship with Riley.  The prayer box she’d given me that I’d put on my nightstand.  By my bed rests the photo of us grasping each other’s hands as we were about to parasail hundreds of feet over the ocean.  The photobooth pictures and candids grace each side of my mirror.  Goodbyes are painful.  No questions asked.

But often we neglect the freedom and excitement of goodbye.  It’s easy to pack up and leave for a week in Mexico because the goodbye is much anticipated and short-lived.  Adventure captivates our mind.  But when it comes to moving to a new place, to the unknown, goodbye means tears and knots in our stomachs.  Adventure isn’t usually the first thing that pops into our minds.  While I don’t advocate for frowning upon our sadness, I believe we don’t give goodbyes enough credit.

With under a month before the big move, I look forward to new friends, new home, new decor and new routine.  Yes, there is much unknown and new, but there are so many happy thoughts along the way.  I’m taking on this move with one of my dear friends Abby, and we already started a bucket list that includes watching every season of Friends a, foreign film viewing and cookie eatings.  It’s also been a solid six years since I decorated my room, so I’m enjoying the excuse to plan out a new arrangement.  Much gratitude to Target for the glorious light-up coffee sign I bought.  And in a new environment, I can’t wait to explore to find my little nook to get work done (and, of course, take a caffeine break at a cute coffee shop).

Each goodbye requires a new hello.  After my three week travel blitz this summer, I really had time to recharge and refresh, and the distance played a huge part.  With a move approaching quickly, I’m excited to say hello to growth and development in a new environment.  I know there will be tears saying goodbye to the place I’ve spent my entire life, but the sheer elation thinking about the experiences waiting for me keeps my heart racing.

I know my goodbye to the place I’ve grown up and the friends I’ve had for years (specifically Riley) is not the end.  I look forward to FaceTime dates, snail mail and phone calls.  My darling new Keurig (her name is Caffy) that Riley bought for me will take esteemed residence in my new home.  The frame Dana and Samantha gave me will house happy memories for me to reminisce upon.  My succulent named Cate generously given to me by Abby will grace the new abode.  A new home may equate to new furniture and paint colors, but bring those memories to ease the goodbye.

Even though my life may be more distant from the familiar, I can already anticipate the excitement that will drive me to pick up my phone and gush about my experiences, celebrations and laughs.  Treating goodbye as a new adventure provides the freedom to become independent and explore a new place full of friends-to-be and ideas-to-explore.  So, don’t let it phase you, friend.

Bises,

K